Suppose:
If this is a common sight in your home, you will begin wondering for sure:
“Am I raising a stubborn and misbehaving Only kid at my home?”
Parenting has never been less challenging, especially if you are a proud parent of an only child. The upbringing of an only child comes with a unique blend of blessings and battles. While you have complete freedom to focus all your attention and efforts on your only child, he might, on the other hand, consider it as his privilege, which isn’t in the family’s interest.
With no sibling fights, more resources to share, and undivided attention, parenting the only child might seem easier. But here’s the hard fact. You have a larger and more powerful challenge coming your way: “Managing your child’s weird behavior without falling prey to his emotional outbursts and illogical demands is a greater challenge than you can ever imagine.”
If it sounds horrifying and disturbing, where your only child constantly refuses to share, throws frequent tantrums, or insists on having things their way, you’re not alone. Every key has a lock to complement it. Similarly, this blog encompasses several proven strategies to help you and many parents alike take over this behavioral turbulence.
While this blog, in its course of discussion, walks you through the possible solutions to this grave problem, you can create a strong foundation by instilling empathy, humility, and cooperation without compromising your child’s happiness.
Most only children enjoy two main privileges - emotionally rich environments and 100% necessary (and unnecessary) attention from all the family members. As a result, their opinions, desires, and habits are deeply noticed, cared for, and considered on their face value. It is great to pay attention to your child’s needs and demands. Now, the extent to which you should pay attention is a matter of wisdom and self-introspection, because such privileges may lead to the development of inflated self-importance, and he might start believing that his voice and choice carry weight and significance, which may become the reason for child stubbornness. Such only children begin using resistance as their tool to feel in control of the situation, which is not the case every time.
A child’s misbehavior shouldn’t be taken as his disobedience or opposition at first glance. He is trying to check the boundaries to see how far he can push his demands. When the parents surrender to his demands with a view to preventing meltdowns or arguments, it sends a signal of acceptance (and fake victory) to the child, empowering him for similar future actions.
Punchline: Begin by changing his emotional environment to change the child’s behavior. Treat the roots, cure the soul.
Everything, including love, care, and discipline, looks and feels beautiful within limits. This same principle stands true when dealing with children. Like adults, even children appreciate clarity in thoughts and consistency in actions by their parents. It is never a good idea to shift your rules daily. Doing so will send an incorrect message to your only child, and doubt your actions, decisions, and judgment, making it challenging for your child to trust you.
Hence, experts recommend being consistent in your interactions with children. Stick to the prescribed family routines, whether it’s about bedtime, screen time, or meal requests. Kids these days are smart, and they do observe you minutely. Send them the right message each time by adhering to your firm but loving boundaries.
In the wake of quick results, many parents resort to emotional bribing (“Be good and I’ll give you candy”) or impulsive punishments (“No toys for a week!”). Never do these as they confuse your child rather than correcting him. Your primary purpose is to remove the child’s stubbornness and improve his behavior. Hence, saying “No” firmly but calmly is a clear, appreciable, and preferable approach to communicating your disapproval. Remember not to be intense or aggressive while dealing with your children because they are in a phase where life and destiny have arrayed many lessons for them to learn and opportunities to grow.
Punchline: Freedom, within the safe spaces of loving boundaries, is the key to a child’s all-around development.
Saying ‘Yes’ and fulfilling your child’s wishes is a great approach to affirming your love and care. While saying “yes” often brings the child closer to you, at times, “No” also needs to be a part of your communication. Accepting your child’s demands unquestioningly is actually a trap for you and an entitlement for the kid. Not everyone on this earth would love and care for your child as you do, because our society has harsher and tougher ways to deal. It has been observed that children who are pampered with instant yes, find it challenging and problematic to face the real world that ruthlessly denies their demands.
It obviously feels like a gruesome situation for your little toddler. If you are truly concerned about your child and want him to behave decently, offer him controlled choices: “Would you like to wear your red or blue T-shirt?” “Do you want to read before or after dinner?” Posing your child with questions bearing precise answers to choose from gives him no room to show his dislike or throw his tantrums. If you adopt this approach, your family won’t witness power struggles.
Either parents or grandparents can take the onus of teaching the child that privileges are earned, not demanded. A proven way to make the child realize this truth is to let him take part in household chores, acts of kindness, or a social activity. More than the realization, your child will grow humble and develop a sense of gratitude for all that he has or receives in the future. Offering him a special treat, screen time, or a visit to his favorite beach will help him appreciate life and its gifts.
Punchline: If your child hears “No” today, he will respect his boundaries tomorrow.
To bring in that sense of gratitude, one should be humble, down-to-earth, and carry an unpretentious attitude. Empathy is a great emotion that antidotes egoistic and self-centered behaviors. An empathetic person understands the plight of their peers and endeavors to help them to the best of their abilities.
The best way for parents to teach empathy to children is by using role-play, storytelling, or even asking children to observe real situations. All these will help the kid understand others' feelings and be on the same page with them.
Imagine a situation where your child grabs or snatches a toy from another child. Don’t shout, but ask gently, “How would you feel if someone did that to you?” If your child is smart and empathetic, he will soon understand his mistake and amend it. At home, at an event, or elsewhere, parents can regularly highlight acts of kindness. Teach your child through practical and real-life examples. When you praise even their smallest gesture, they, too, will adopt and make it a part of their lives.
Punchline: Let Empathy melt a stubborn mind and soothe a humble heart.
Compared to adults, kids mostly bubble with energy and enthusiasm. While adults know where to use their energy, kids need direction and a purpose to channel their energy. If you observe closely, you will understand that the stubborn behavior that children demonstrate is actually misdirected energy. You will generally get to see such stubbornness in children who are alone and have no sibling to share their day, love, joy, sorrows, and toys. Such only children mostly face a buildup of emotional or physical energies with no outlet to vent them.
More than ever, it is essential to introduce your kid to activities that require him to use his energy, brain, and logic. Count this as the best opportunity to let your child be engaged in creative arts, martial arts, dance, gardening, or physical play. While you take the first step to enroll them in any of these activities, make sure they experience structured failure.
Structured failure can be anything, like losing a game, struggling to build something, or a creative design going wrong. Just like victory, failures are also essential. If the moment of victory boosts their enthusiasm and morale, the moment of failure builds their resilience and diminishes their ego. In the end, you will discover a child who is humble in his behavior and more grounded in life’s reality.
Related Blog: Fun Activities You Can Do on a Weekend With Kids
Punchline: Never see stubbornness as an issue. Simply redirect that energy into purposeful play. You will soon witness frustration transforming into focus.
The probability of success in parenting a stubborn and misbehaving child depends solely on the bonding and the unspoken agreement between the teammates (parents). It is quite obvious that one of the parents is generally strict while the other is more lenient. These opposites create an imbalance, resulting in a gap. Our little smart wizards quickly recognize this gap and begin manipulating it.
In such a scenario, children develop adequate clarity as to when they should approach their father and when they should cuddle in the lap of their mother. If you don’t want your kid to take advantage, you should mind this gap. Privately discuss your discipline strategies and agree on responses in advance.
It is never a healthy habit to correct or shout at each other in front of your little toddler. Unfortunately, your actions may weaken both your positions. In case either of you gets agitated or aggressive, walk to the “calm down corner” in your home. Nowadays, a few homes do have a calm-down corner to help their residents manage their emotions and settle without drama or punishment. This is a great idea to think calmly, without ripples.
When both of you present the same response, the child understands that he has no option but to improve and amend his mistakes.
Punchline: To correct your child’s actions, stand as a united parenting team.
Children are great observers. They learn from what they see around them. Additionally, they are excellent at imitating others. Do visit his room quietly, and you will see him mimicking someone. It is a good game. Your child may not follow your orders or instructions if his mood is not right. But if they see you modeling a specific behavior, there is a good possibility that they may adopt it almost immediately.
Almost every couple is facing stress and tension in their lives. But parents must remember never to bring their professional stress home. Suppose the husband yells at his wife in the presence of the child. In that case, the child will adopt yelling as part of his life, and they too may begin doing the same, victimizing the females at home. Hence, take measures to prevent yelling or angry outbursts. Always remember to respond to a situation or a person instead of reacting. Staying gentle, soft-spoken, and disciplined at home is the best way to model the right behavior for your children.
The rule of thumb to keep your family happy is to stay calm, composed, respectful, and emotionally balanced when interacting with anyone in the family. Secondly, apologize when you lose your cool, because that is not what is expected of you at home.
Punchline: Where the child daily sees his parents behaving with humility, accountability, and respect, he too will act in the same way.
As seen in many societies, many parents end up giving in just to maintain peace within the family or get caught up in daily power struggles that drain their home of love and happiness.
Parenting a strong-willed only child can feel like an emotional tug-of-war. But remember: your child is not trying to hurt you—they're testing the world and their place within it.
Every tantrum can be a chance to learn. Every “No!” is an opportunity to teach patience, and every misstep is a path to maturity. With consistent guidance, healthy boundaries, and plenty of empathy, your child can transform from stubborn to sensible—and shine in all the right ways.
Start today. Choose just one strategy from above—and stick with it. Which one will you begin with?
At Bloom, we believe that parenting isn’t about perfect children—it’s about growing with your child through every high and low. Only children need just as much structure and emotional balance as they do love and freedom. Our approach combines positive discipline, emotional coaching, and child-friendly activities to help parents raise resilient, respectful, and empathetic individuals.
Because in a world where every child is unique, conscious parenting makes all the difference.
